Last and certainly not least. My family is driving me fucking insane.
My grandma plays horrendous mind games. My mom abandoned me when I was a kid. I don’t know who my father is. The first memory I have is of my first step father sexually abusing me and beating me. My grandmother is emotionally and was physically abusive. My brothers are self absorbed dicks who treat me like a pariah because I’m only their half blood. My eldest brother always hits on my friends and then subsequently makes me lose friends because of that awkwardness. He constantly puts me down or snaps at me but then hits me up for money. The other two could probably care less if I died or not.
I’m always constantly feeling worthless and it’s 100% because of my family but I feel pathetic and useless for bringing it up to anyone so while I complain about my family and briefly go into certain detail I’ve never fully divulged everything about what has happened to me growing up or how that still controls my life to this day and I just need to let it go but no matter how hard I try it doesn’t help. I’m anxious, scared and hateful all the time.